In the Wake of Pregnancy/Infant Loss, Hope Still Shines Bright

October is Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Month. This is a loss that can easily be overlooked, especially when the baby dies early in pregnancy. Yet we need to acknowledge the grief and pain parents’ experience. The emptiness and heartache are real. But so is hope.

Several of my loved ones and dear friends have lost babies in the womb or shortly after they were born. I have some understanding of the pain they faced. A little over 18 years ago I lost the fifth of my tinies.

Hope Following Pregnancy Loss

Although my grief has tempered in the nearly two decades since my little loves went to be with the Lord, I still think about them often. I still miss what could have been. I still ache at times, wondering who they would have looked like, what their interests would have been. I’m still saddened when I think of all the memories we missed making together.

Yet hope shines bright … even after pregnancy loss.

Twenty-five years ago, my days were consumed with the death of my first baby. I struggled to simply breathe every day. I couldn’t see past the darkness of death.

God slowly reached through the fog of my pain to give me hope that joy and goodness still existed. Through my four subsequent losses He continually reminded me of those truths.

Today, although I wish I would have had the chance to know, love, and raise these little ones, my days aren’t defined by my loss. I don’t live my loss; instead, I live as one blessed, gifted in so many ways.

Although I wish I would have had the chance to know, love, and raise the little ones I lost to miscarriage, my days aren't defined by my loss. I live as one blessed, gifted in so many ways.... because #hope shines bright! #pregnancyloss Share on X

My unborn babies will never be forgotten. My love for them remains strong. But God has brought much good out of our loss:

• a stronger appreciation for life and the four children I’ve been given to raise;
• a growing faith;
• an awareness of how fragile this earthly life is and how near heaven is;
• renewed trust in God’s faithfulness;
• empathy for others who have faced such loss.

And this is merely a partial list of the good.

Hope Remains

If you’ve faced the devastation of losing a baby, I’m so sorry! Don’t be ashamed or run from your pain. Acknowledge it. Your loss is real. Your pain understandable. Grieve, knowing you don’t grieve alone.

Give God your broken heart, and let Him mend it. He will, you know! I know it doesn’t seem like it if your loss is recent, but the Lord we serve is a God of redemption. Wait expectantly on Him to act. He won’t leave you in the dark.

God’s blessings will never replace the precious life/lives you lost. They aren’t meant to. Those babies you held so briefly will always be held in your heart; they’ll always be part of your story. But by trusting God, you’ll find that beauty will eventually grow from the ashes, light will begin to shine in the dark, new life will start growing where before you only saw desert.

By trusting God in your loss, you'll find that beauty will eventually grow from the ashes, light will begin to shine in the dark, new life will start growing where before you only saw desert. #hope Share on X

Losing those precious little lives threatened to break me, but leaning into God’s grace allowed me to experience joy and notice goodness once again. He’ll do the same for you.

That’s redemption.

That’s the hope we have through Jesus Christ!

Losing those precious little lives to miscarriage threatened to break me, but leaning into God's grace allowed me to experience joy and notice goodness once again. That's redemption. That's the #hope we have through Jesus Christ!… Share on X

“Rejoice in hope; be patient in affliction; be persistent in prayer.¹³ Share with the saints in their needs; pursue hospitality…. Rejoice with those who rejoice; weep with those who weep.” Romans 12:12-13,15 CSB

Reflections: Do you know someone who experienced pregnancy loss or infant loss? Show them Jesus’ love by acknowledging their loss and simply being there to listen. Have you faced such a loss? I’m so sorry, and I’m listening if you want to talk.